Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
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