She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Randomize
