Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
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