I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Randomize