I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize
