Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
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