Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
he wants to bone in the snuggie
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
