i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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