i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
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