when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
honey bunches of taint.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
My vagina is officially offended.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize
