I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
