1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
