Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
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