I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
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