Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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