He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Randomize
