You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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