Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
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