"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
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