Fine. I'll sleep in my office
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Randomize