i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
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