just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
Randomize