Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
The feeling are messing with the penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
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