Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Randomize
