You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
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