jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
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