sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
Randomize
