So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
