Will you blow on my dice?
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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