Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Randomize
