you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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