i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Enjoy the penises
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
Randomize