Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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