The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
Randomize
