East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize
