Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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