angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
