I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
