It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
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