Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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