Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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