Writing my paper on freud at bar
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Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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