You're so nebulous sometimes
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Randomize
