I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Randomize
