your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize
