Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Randomize
