i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
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