have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
