come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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