my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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